"May I have your attention, please"

GOODBYE!!
David are you reading?
Listen Up Ho's. Tugboat has decided to take a fuckin stand.
Starting today I'm saying goodbye all soft drinks. This includes Dr. Pepper which you all know is something I love. But, this is just the beginning. It's with a tear in my eye, and lump in my throat I have also decided to swear off my beloved Sweet Tea.
What gives?
Recently a blogger that I worshipped has expressed his distain with trying to shed the pounds. Tugboat left the blogger a scathing comment, and spewed bullshit galore.
Here's the deal ho's.
I'm morbidly obese. Nobody, no thyroid, no injury, no nothing caused this to happen. The culprit was my mouth, and my ability to stuff it. Don't jump to no deep conclusion that something else deeper is the root of my food addiction.
Biatch the problem is I love to eat, and lazy has a picture beside it in the dictionary with my face showing.
I've not always been a fatass. But this is all talk, and b.s. It's time to shut the hell up, and do something.
There are a few enemies that would love to attend my funeral, so to deny them any joy in the event of my departure, I've decided to take care of myself.
What pisses me off is I knew this moment would come, it's just the fact that I let it get so out of control. Damn fool I was.
Instead of me waiting until I'm strapped up to some gurney getting my chest cracked open, I'm taking BABY STEPS to extend my health streak.
The only one to blame is myself.
So ho's here it goes. There will be no more updates, or rants about how hard it is.
ACTION.
We all have choices.
David, I pray one day we will be able to laugh at how fat we use to be, instead of laughing at how fat we are.
COME ON HO!!!
Let's Ride

Comments

Mistress Maddie said…
No long pep speech from me ho, I just wish you all the luck Tugboat. I want to see you and David in a wet tee shirt contest when your done!
April 29, 2009 at 5:56 PM
Sam said…
Hell wet tee, how about a wet man pantie contest!
April 29, 2009 at 6:01 PM
David Dust said…
Excellent job! But I don't care HOW skinny we might get ... my shit is staying DRY and offstage.

Check my blog tomorrow for an update about how it's going for me. I think you'll be pleased.

I love you, Ho! Stay away from that Evil Dr. and his sweet poison!!

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO
April 29, 2009 at 6:37 PM
Miss Ginger Grant said…
Good for you, baby! That mean's there's at least three of us fighting the battle of the bulge! I've been on Nutrisystem® for three days, and I haven't even killed anyone yet!
Have you tried Diet Soft Drinks? They're not quite as good but they're better than water- now that's an evil liquid for ya!
April 29, 2009 at 7:09 PM
mrs.missalaineus said…
if you all do this i will force myself to go to the dentist, even if it means they have to knock me out to get me into that damn chair!

we can do this! it's for our health and longevity!!!

xxalainaxx
April 29, 2009 at 7:27 PM
the dogs' mother said…
I gave up years and years and years of General Foods International coffee. Took a long time but I did it. Twice I've taken a sip of a sugared coffee or coffee drink by accident and it was AWFUL. I had to spit it out. So you will loose the taste for it over time.
April 29, 2009 at 8:11 PM
Joy said…
Don't substitute with diet colas! I am addicted to Diet Coke, well Coke Zero to be specific, and I KNOW it keeps people from losing weight. I try to give it up and miss the fizz of the brown carbonated battery acid with aspertame. I WILL give them up along with other sinful habits and am working up to it.

Way to go, Tugboat!! I'm cheering you on!
April 29, 2009 at 10:54 PM
#9 said…
just one thing.. you are my hero
love ya
#9
April 30, 2009 at 8:30 AM
Wonder Man said…
good luck, I'm sure you will do it
April 30, 2009 at 1:39 PM
Dan said…
I havnt drank soda in over 7 years. I just couldnt find a flavor that mixed well with my vodka!

seriously though, god for you. Diet or regular, it is all bad for us.
May 1, 2009 at 7:40 AM
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